Whine & Cheese

Express Lane: Issue 43

Broadway's 'The Color Purple' Will Close Feb. 24 - The show comes to an end after a 2 1/2 year run... guess Fantasia really was a big box office draw. (1/24/08)

Amazing Race 12's Jen and Nate are Still Together - Well, knock me me over with a feather!  After a post-Race break, the two say things have "never been better" (though that's was a pretty low bar). (1/16/08)

Clinton Chooses Dancing Over Singing - Asked by Tyra Banks what reality show she would prefer to compete on, Clinton chooses 'Dancing With the Stars' - now once I know where Obama and Edwards stand on this issue, I think I will finally be able to make up my mind. (1/15/08)

Oprah Winfrey Getting Her Own TV Network - Perhaps ticked that Ellen Replaced Her As Favorite TV Star the Discovery Health channel will become her OWN... OWN as in Oprah Winfrey Network.  Yes, that's the name... not making this stuff up! (1/15/08)

Woman Who Made Hillary Cry Votes Obama - A pretty funny footnote... ok, I'll give you "emotional moment," but frick sake she didn't cry! (1/9/08)

'Big Brother' Returns to Showtime - Wasn't sure 'After Dark' would return for the first non-summer BB edition... sinc the premium channels are hurting for programming like the networks, but the wildly addictive (and unedited) 3 hour nightly block returns to ShoToo. (1/8/08)

TAR12: The Final 3

Well it appears I kept to my plan of taking a "vacation" from weekly TAR posts...

This is only my 3rd post about TAR12.  It was nice to not have the pressure of coming up with something for the next morning.  I had felt like things were getting repetitive both with the show and thus what I had to say about the show... so I encourage my fellow bloggers if it stops being fun, stop doing it (and don't apologize for it either!)... if we wanted homework, we'd go back to school right?!

The last thing I wrote about TAR12 was nearly two months ago with a post centering around the two old guys - Grampa Donald and "Who's Your Mean Daddy?" Ronald - and you lie like a rug if you used the either of their names and the phrase "last leg" meaning they would actually be on the last leg of The Amazing Race!

All credit to both of them.  While Nick pulled a bit more of the weight (often literally with those backpacks!) with Donald, we're still talking about a 68-year old man racing around the world.  Ronald has undergone quite the transformation with daughter Christina... or else Nate/Jen were hogging all the "I hate you!" come editing time... and we haven't heard "boo" about the hernia for a couple of continents!   While I believe Ronald always had good intentions, one only hopes this new-found respect (or maybe just improved communication skills) spill over to their post-Race lives... it was nice to see.

Feel good "old man" stories be damned, it is hard not to consider TK & Rachel the favorites going into the final, and usually grueling, final leg.  While Donald is the elder-statesman this season, TK & Rachel's combined age is 13 years younger than Ronald!   Given the immaturity we often see on the Race from folks far older, it is hard to believe that TK & Rachel are 22 & 23 (if you're too lazy to do the math, that makes Ronald 58 years old)... and while one can certainly question their intensity level (they're nice/likable enough... granted pretty bland, but almost refreshingly so, reality TV-wise), they are competitive enough that coupled with their youth and relative fitness they seem have to the winning edge...

... and with the demise of Nate/Jen, we are left with the quite rare villain-less TAR finale.  And for that, I hate them!!!!  I hate them!!!!  I can't even stand to look at them!!!!!  (Just wanted to see what that felt like)... not really, this time around it'll be the nice guys and gals not finishing last but 1st, 2nd, and 3rd.

TAR12: Ronald (Mc)Donald

I'll keep to my "maybe" of last week and keep my thoughts about this week's TAR episode "I've Become The Archie Bunker Of The Home" short... well, of the quantity I feel like!

This episode will most be remembered for the two patriarchal figures on this season's Race. 

First, we've have dad Ronald who provided the title of this episode.  My guess is that it would be easier to run the Race with Archie Bunker rather than Ronald.  But I am sure many of us have experienced instances where a parent just won't shut up and/or commits a verbal faux pas.  Granted Ronald did each of these a dozen of times in this one episode... and it became fairly cringe-inducing.  Poor Christina... though I suspect it was her idea to go on the Race.

Next up, we have grandpa Donald who is being more of a physical (vs. Ronald's mental) drag on the team.  While it is nice to see someone not running around with their head cut off, Nicolas is going to have a tough time if he can't get his gramps out of mosey-mode... and I'll save you from the visual of Donald in his ditch-vaulting outfit... which provided the LOL moments of the night... pretty much anything involving animals or mud is comedy gold (and that includes next week's previews... milking a camel?).

On a nicer visual note, I read a re-cap somewhere that visually compared Jason to Mark Wahlberg. I'm lazy and didn't feel like screen-capping and pix of the Jason and Lorena are lacking on the TAR site... I see the resemblance (more on the show than in this particular picture below)... but let's say Mark's physically skimpier cousin.

Lastly, one of my huge pet peeves on TAR (and any reality show) is the invocation of God... so I sent up a big 'ole "thank you Jesus" when someone finally said “We are religious people, but we have no illusions that God cares whether or not we win the Amazing Race.”

Ummm, God...  not funny, not funny at all.

Express Lane: Issue 39

Laila Ali Steps in 'Gladiators' Ring - DWTS continues to get folks new jobs!   Last season's female dancing "star" stand-out is set to co-hosts (with Hulk Hogan), NBC's re-introduction of 'American Gladiators.' (11/9/07)

'24' Postpones Season 7 Due to Strike - And we have the first major casualty of the writers' strike!  With only 8 episodes in the can, Jack & Co. latest day has been postponed indefinitely until the show can provides its trademark uninterrupted run of 24 episodes. (11/8/07) 

ITF to investigate suspected poisoning of Tommy Haas before Davis Cup match - The German suspects the Russians of allegedly poisoning his 'dessert or a Latte macchiato' - with doping and match fixing allegations the tennis tour is sounding more like a spy novel everyday. (11/8/07)

Showtime Grows a Fourth Season of 'Weeds' - Though we're still waaay behind on Season 3 (and thinkin' it's not as good as S1 & 2), Mary Louise Parker & Co. will be back for another season (as will its 'partner' show David Duchovny's 'Californication). (11/5/07)

Sabrina Bryan Confirms 'DWTS' Romance - Although it seemed obvious and probably still will not squash folks wanting him to be gay, the Cheetah Girl confirmed that she is dating her dancing partner, Mark Ballas. (11/5/07)

Food Network's Giada Pregnant - Mamma Mia! Congrats to one of my FN faves (and her hubby Todd!) on their upcoming first child due in April... one thing's for sure the kid will eat good! (11/5/07)

HBO Sets Up 'Treatment' Program - Interesting premise and cast for this upcoming HBO series about therapy... but 45 half-hour episodes for 5 nights a week over 9 weeks seems like more than I (and our TiVo) would be able to keep up with.  (10/31/07)

Dovolani Takes on Dancing’s Inaba - Drama on the DWTS set as Carrie Ann Innaaaah-ba allegedly gives Tony the finger after he gives her a rulebook, highlighting what defines a "lift"... while I agree Inaba has been a bit cranky lately, sounds like Tony got what was coming to him. (10/29/07)

Big Brother 8's Eric and Jessica are still together - The show-mance lives on even outside the BB8 house, heck even Danielle & Nick still seemed cozy at the Fox Reality Awards. (10/29/07)

Viva Laughlin's cancellation moves Amazing Race 12's debut up to Nov. 4 - Well, that was a pretty easy prediction I (and many others!) made over a month ago. (10/22/07)

TAR12: Kiss My Irish Ass

Before I begin this TAR entry, a warning that these "recaps" might not be the weekly feature it has been in the past.

I don't want to burden myself  with an "assignment" type entry.  In general, it doesn't end up working well, either here on  W&C or many other blogs.  So while it's nice to have a guaranteed topic to blog about, I'm not going to force it.  If I have something to say, it'll be here... if not, I am confident the world will go on without my insight(s). 

This year marks the first season I have skipped Survivor and I don't miss it the least bit.  For me, the strategy part and challenges have played themselves out... and even with this first TAR episode, I kind of feel the repetitiveness of the "cast"... the dysfunctional dating couples, falling down old people, extremely likable African Americans (I know, I know... politically incorrect, but true!), etc.  However, what does keep the show fresh for me is the travel aspect... so I have absolutely no plans to stop watching... and I still got goosebumps when Phil said "the world is waiting for you."

And while I am quite sure teams have had to leave from the International terminal at LAX in past seasons, I finally recognized it/paid attention last night... always fun to recognize some place on the Race (which doesn't happen all too often for me).  It served as a reminder that I should travel internationally again some time!

Surprisingly enough, the Freaks were pretty fun and likable, though no creativity awards for the other couples who immediately dubbed Team Goth as such.  I couldn't quite keep track of the all-woman teams other than the Lesbian Ministers (did some other team actually say of them "those bitches are behind us?")...  but there are blond friends and brunette sisters, but indistinguishable to me beyond that.

As far as the dysfunctional dating couples, in order of good to bad shape we have:  TK and Rachel (dreadlocks guy)... Jason and Lorena (only one major squabble in the car)... and Jennifer and Nathan where the verbal abuse immediately commenced upon landing on the quite rainy Emerald Isle (re: Jen's lack of running... "You are the worst person at this I have ever met"  Yikes!).  Likewise, I'm sure Nathan just loves the fact that everyone in America now knows he's was unfaithful/cheater.

Speaking of asses, having watched enough Cesar Millan/Dog Whisperer... I am guessing there is a correlation between the mental health of couple and their ability to move a donkey.   I'll keep this entry relatively spoiler-free, but it would have been "good riddance" for me to the two couples who had trouble with their donkeys... which brings us full circle and to the title of this episode (as noted by Christina, running the Race with Dad Ronald) "Donkeys Have Souls Too."

Amazing Race 12: Teams Unveiled!

In case you missed it on my sidebar, as expected by many (myself included), Viva Laughlin has been canceled after two airings allowing The Amazing Race to slip right back into its Sunday night slot.  The new season kicks off on November 4th.

Here are the teams... 8 of the 11 hailing from the Los Angeles area:

Ronald & Christina (58/26):  Father/Daughter
Kynt & Vyxsin (31/29):  "Dating Goths" (Can't wait to see them try to catch a cab!)
Lorena & Jason (27/33): Dating
Azaria & Hendeke (27/27): Brother/Sister

Kate & Pat (49/65): Married Ministers, TAR's first all-lesbian team (first lesbian ever?)
Shana & Jennifer (32/32): Friends
Donald & Nicolas (68/23):  Grandfather/Grandson
Nathan & Jennifer (24/23): Dating

T.K. & Rachel (22/23): Newly dating
Marianna & Julia (25/26): Sisters
Ari & Staella (21/23): Best Friends (Yes, it's spelled Staella and Ari is described as "catty" which I am guessing means he's gay)

UPDATE:  Ah yes, my TAR buddy Gail reminded me that there has been an "out" lesbian on the Race before ... and not too long ago, Father/Daughter Duke & Lauren from TAR10.   Boy, my mind really is starting to go!?!?  Though they did only last 3 episode (4th team Philiminated... that was the season with the surprise first leg double Philimination).

Express Lane: Issue 34

'Conchords,' 'Entourage' Keep Flying - In the post-Sopranos world, no huge surprise that HBO renews these two critically acclaimed comedy series -- look for more "sometime next year." (8/17/07)

Derek to "Tales" and Chad to "Boyz" - Contestants from NBC's "Grease: You're The One That I Want" continue land some decent theater gigs. (8/16/07)

Casting: 'Housewives' Get New Neighbors - It was only a matter of time before Wisteria Lane had a gay couple, I can vouch for one half of the couple - Tuc Watkins - who is a quite fun actor to watch given his work on the ABC soap 'One Life To Live.' (8/15/07)

Dr. Will: ''I'm the P.T. Barnum of reality TV'' - An EW interview with the delightfully self-loving and original "Evil" of Big Brother... and find out which BB8 houseguest is a Chilltown plant.

Kelly Osbourne to join cast of `Chicago' - Has stunt casting on this show finally gone too far... even if it is for the London production?  But don't worry too much, she's not playing Roxie or Velma... but the admittedly more appropriate Mama Morton. (7/30/07)

Non-elimination legs dropped from Amazing Race 12 - It's going to be a more streamlined (aka shorter) TAR season with a "tough" and "younger" group of contestants.  TAR is NOT on the fall schedule, but will return mid-season (or more likely when a new show tanks). (7/25/07)

TAR-AS: Not So Amazing Finale

Thoughts on last night's season finale of The Amazing Race: All Stars episode titled "Low To The Ground, That's My Technique"... if you didn't know who uttered that line.... well, you don't deserve to know!

I guess by now we should know that "all star" versions of reality shows never give us very satisfying winners.  Amber (with Rob in tow, of course!) took it home for Survivor and I am still trying to wash out the bad taste of Boogie doing it on last summer's Big Brother.  I had a hard time stumbling across anyone who was sincerely enthusiastic about any of the final 3 teams racing to the final finish mat at the San Francisco Botanical Gardens... huh?!?!  I am sure they are quite lovely... but c'mon your finishing in one of the most stunning and scenic cities in the country and a pretty generic park setting is the best they can come up with for the All-Stars finale backdrop (I know, filming in secrecy plays a big part in it).

...and pretty much that thought was the one that was running through my head through most of this episode.  Don't get me wrong, I love this show ... why else would this be the 109th blog entry devoted to the show... but it deserved to be so much more.  Granted the folks behind the scenes didn't have much to work with... once Schirma lost their early lead on the beaches of Hawaii ('Charla, you have to run, it's a race, oh, my God, they're going to pass us!'')... any suspense regarding the final order of finish vanished... despite the editing red herrings that Eric/Dani were hitting all the red lights while the Beauty Queens were green light city headed to the mat.

My main quibble was the final combination lock challenge.  Now, I really liked the idea, but what got my "huh?" going was the 10-minute "get out of jail free" card if the team member couldn't crack the code.   Ultimately, the teams arrival time at the Mint was more important than the challenge itself...

When Danielle cracked the code and was on her way she only gained a self-described 2-minute advantage over the Beauty Queen (is it bad that I am still not sure which one's which?) who gained released after 10 minutes of failed attempts.  As you know, I am no fan of Eric and Dani, but at this point if they lose to the Beauty Queens (my preferred winners), it would really seem wrong if the BQs (or Schmirna for that matter) won when they didn't even successfully crack/complete this final challenge!   I know, I know... the 10 minute limit was there to ensure a tight(er) sprint to the finish... but it was just a quite contrived way of doing it.  Again, I am only show my love of TAR by criticizing it so!

So the winners of the TAR All Stars are a team that never raced together before... and who were/are in a relationship that was a tad cynical about in the first place.  Me thinks we won't be seeing any proposals on The Early Show this morning... unless Rob and Amber crash the set to announce plans for their next reality show... or Eric teaming up with Jeremy for the next installment in the Dumb and Dumber series... during the [insert product placement] cell phone call to his former Race partner, I couldn't decide whether Jeremy was just stoned or that his hair was starting to grow back after a recent lobotomy.

Thanks to everyone who stuck around, read, commented on my TAR rants and raves for another season.  I will certainly be back for TAR12 (which I am pretty sure is a "go")... but until then, I will just have to figure out something else to blog about on Mondays!

UPDATE:  Just in case you were curious...  Danielle and Eric broke up after the race

TAR-AS: Chew On Some Guam

Thoughts on the penultimate episode of TAR: All Stars, "Oh My God, The Teletubbies Go To War"... Oswald's reference to seeing a running Charla in military gear.

It seems like we've waited a long time to get down to the final 3 teams... but, as the poet T.S. Eliot wrote, will the season end "not with a bang, but a whimper??  Even the editors couldn't muster up too much excitement in the episode...  there were no changes in the order of finish from the previous leg (yes, I know Schmirna technically finished ahead of Crabby and Whiny)... and despite a desperate attempt to make the final Philimination look competitive, Danny and Oswald still finished in last place... thereby not even creating any real or false sense of tension with the 30-minute penalty.... and let's face it, Guam wasn't that exciting either... thus scratching off one destination off my "1,000 Places To See Before You Die" list.

I was sad to see Danny and Oswald go... though much like their first time, they seemed to hit the self-destruct button as the end neared... and they avoided some controversy... I'm sure it wasn't quite fair when their "lost" pilot waved his water bottle to get Oswald's attention during the "rescue" mission.

A couple of fun lines... thanks to Schirma... most memorably when they took the "high road" detour with the humanitarian challenge... because, after all, they "like to help people."  That would have been nice, if actual people were being helped (at first, it sounded "real" but then just an exercise) or if afterwards, Mirna didn't insist they fly the plane a little faster since... umm, we're kind of in a Race here.

Also, Mirna gave us another "hook on phonics" lesson earlier in the episode... where we learned that while in Hong Kong, the correct pronunciation of "airport" is... air-port (English is one of the official languages of Hong Kong).  But Mirna continues on "You have to try to do the right accent. It makes all the difference in the world"... so this explains it... so it's just not adding an "o" onto the end of every word?!   Nevertheless and defying all odds (mine included), Schmirna earn a spot in the final three and become the darkest of horses and subterranean-ish underdogs.

Waltzing to first was the thus far unmentioned Beauty Queens who won yet another crappy first place prize, this time ATVs (shockingly sans any product placement).  Phil continues to pump them up as the possible first-ever all-female winners of TAR.  I guess Schmirna doesn't rate in that department.  In the "deserving" category, the BQs are my lesser of three evils choice to win it all.

Leaving Eric and Danielle as my "anyone but" pick... probably not quite the level of disdain my all-time least favorite winners... TAR6's Freddy and Kendra... and while I made a comparison to TAR3 winners Flo and Zach... I only meant that Eric would likely have to drag whiny/"I can't do this" Dani over the finish line, but the huge difference is that Zach was a likable guy... unlike Eric, who has been just miserable throughout much of this Race.

TAR-AS: Yielding For Dollars

Thoughts on last night's TAR: All Stars episode "Good Doing Business With You"...

After all these years, how does this show keep on tricking me?  I thought for sure we would be down to our final 3 teams tonight and off to the finish line next week... but I missed a couple of things... a) a yield usually means a non-Philimination and b) our TiVo did not dutifully pick up the Monday The Early Show (wishlist: AMAZING RACE & TALK SHOWS) and the interview the philiminated team.   So I pretty much thought Danny & Oswald were about to Cha Cha Cha themselves out of the Race.

Alas, let's start at the beginning.  The teams head over to Asia's answer to Las Vegas and a jump off their version of the Stratosphere, the 600-ft Macau Tower.  The whole thing still makes me weak in the knees to watch... but the extra wires seem to make it slightly less scary and a bit more controlled than a full-out bungee jump... but I still could not imagine taking that first step or leap off the tower. 

However, before the "marked for Philimination" love birds Cranky and Whiny can get over to the tower, it's Danny and Oswald "deal or no deal" with the devils in disguise, Kandice and Dustin, to yield them.  The $45 transaction just baffles Miss Morals (aka Mirna)... who wonders why they would ever do that?!?  At this point, my palm smacks my forehead... race, competition, winning, because you can can can!   That's frickin' why!!

The bitchin' and moanin' surrounding the Yield is getting just as bad as the Survivor finales when the jury members cry about [gasp!] being lied to and misled... this "woe is me!" reaction to "it's frickin' part of the game" needs to be addressed in the next edition of the "15 Minutes and You!" reality television player handbook.   

The yield drama swirls for the remainder of the hour.  The rightfully remorseless Beauty Queens tee-hee-hee their way to first place... Eric obsesses of different ways to send the Miami boys to their demise which makes Mr. "Yes You're Hairline is Receding"'s last yield battle cry of "dirty pirate hookers" seem innocent... Danny and Oswald are too busy believing the yield creates bad karma and thus are blind to the reality that a combo of an incompetent cab driver and stubborness/lack of persistence are the real issues at hand... and well, Schmirna continues their bat-shit crazy ways, with Charla comically going into "talk to the hand" mode.

Finally, I have to make brief mention the detour... as shown in that middle photo, I'm thinking "making noodles" might just become a new euphemism for having some fun in the bedroom... what do you think? 

To avoid looking like a fool yet again, I will not make my Final 3 predictions or desires (you can just go back and look at my last two TAR entries!) this week... but I just checked... the season finale is May 6th... so next week, we should be down to our final Racers.

TAR-AS: Kung Phooey

Not so many thoughts on last night's TAR All Stars episode "We're Trying to Make Love, Not War" (Mirna, to the ninjas, as she was scaling the side of the building... now there's a sentence I never imagined I would write!).

After the watching the teasers for next week's episode (Two teams unite to use the yield against another? I hope its not Charla and Mirna they wouldn't want to  be "Yield Queens" now would they?), I told Todd that I really didn't know what I would blog about for this episode.  It was good, but not a whole lot happened... and it is always a bit of a disappointment when the shows ends in a non-Philimination, particularly when it is a team you wouldn't mind (at all!) to see Philiminated.

It's a no-win situation... do we want the TAR season to end or endure some less than exciting episodes?  I have a feeling most use die-hards don't mind a few extra episodes.  I thought maybe I was just getting some end of season recap fatigue... but a quick spin around the Web showed me that even the "professional" recappers were a bit underwhelmed with this episode.

There was even a TAR creative team brainstorm cramp last night.  In the introduction to the detour, we were told that the options involved two things associated with Hong Kong... kung fu fighting or lost in translation.  Ok, they got kung fu fighting right (I think!?)... but my nose immediately crinkled on the other... if they are referring to the Bill Murray movie Lost in Translation, they might want to imdb-it... it takes place in Tokyo, Japan. 

We could have called this episode Todd's Amazing Race as Kuala Lumpur and Hong Kong are two of the exotic locales that he has traveled to... so while the contestants may not quite get to the same spots (his business travel plans generally don't entail a trip to the local dry cleaner or scaling a building via bamboo scaffolding)... at least the airports look familiar.

So just like last week we are left to wonder about the teams that will be racing to the finish line?  Eric and Dani are marked for Philimination, but my gut tells me they will probably survive the 30 minute penalty... thus putting Schmirna in danger for the always painful 4th place finish... they deserved the last spot after the whole taxi/ferry screw-up, but only avoided it thanks to another missed flight by Eric/Dani.  Otherwise, the other teams are looking strong... Cha Cha Cha seemed to get their mojo back (easy to do when you are the only team to get the first flight out and the Fast Forward) and the BQs are as focused as ever... though I suspect they are next week's Yield target.  Who else?!

TAR-AS: Malaise-a

Thoughts on last night's episode of The Amazing Race: All Stars titled "The Way You Look, Yeah"... to tell you the truth, I can't tell you who said it or in what context... but it was just one of those episodes... 

It was down to the Final 5 All-Stars teams... but even the editors could not do a whole lot with this episode.  It was pretty clear from the get-go that past winners, Uchenna and Joyce, were in some serious trouble.  If we get to eavesdrop on conversations revolving around tight airport connection times, there's usually a good reason. It was a risky move and could have paid off (though these days, it's more of a surprise when flights are on time or early)... but the missed connection in Frankfurt took the likable couple out of the Race... and sadly even out of their final episode of the season.

There wasn't too much joy elsewhere as the teams headed to Kuala Lumpur, well if you weren't an all-girl team. Danny and Oswald had an unusually cranky episode and we'll get to Eric & Dani in just a bit.  But it was the Beauty Queens and Schmirna who were quite good-natured throughout the episode as they comfortably landed on the finish mat as the first two teams.  Granted, Mirna remained delusional.... "we have a lot of fans here in Malaysia" Mirna notes as one person yells out "Go Charla!" in the cookie eating detour (my money is that it was one the TAR production crew who yelled it out).  But this is only topped during the newspaper recycling collection roadblock with Mirna cheerfully recognizing the young people of Malaysia as the "future Charla and Mirnas of the world"... god help us all.

The odd dialogue did not stop there... and unknowingly it was thanks to Dustin & Kandice who, having no clue that Uchenna & Joyce were still half a world away, yielded Eric & Dani.  Now, yes... I would be pissed if I was yielded... but it's part of the game... and even a back-handed compliment.  But this was clearly not the spirit that Eric and an increasingly busty Danielle took it in... and I am pretty the record was broken for the number of times the word "hooker" was uttered in a one hour block of network television.

Ok, hookers... yeah, I get that... but just plain 'ole hookers is a bit banal for Mr. Colege (sic), so Eric drops them a further level down in hooker-hood and starts referring to them as "dirty pirate hookers."  What the heck is that?  Does it require said hooker to don an eye-patch or head bandanna?  Does it involved a hook?   Require that they refer to their trick as "matey"?   Eric also must be confused about Dustin & Kandice's past.. they are former Miss America contestants... the one that's a scholarship pageant... not the Trump-owned Miss USA... if they were a part of that competition, I could possibly believe they were indeed dirty pirate hookers.

We're down to the Final 4... so who will win?  I can't possibly imagine Schmirna taking it home especially for the usually arduous final leg(s).  My clear "want to win" favorites, Cha Cha Cha, seem to be wavering (just as they did the first time around it when it stopped being "fun")... so that only leaves the Queens, who are looking quite good... and Zach and Flo v2.0... Eric dragging Dani across the finish line.  Eric/Dani are the only team I am rooting against... not terribly likable and never really liked the idea that they were not a returning original team.

TAR-AS: Pole Dance

Thoughts on last night's episode of The Amazing Race: All Stars titled "If I Were In Town, I'd Ask For Your Number"... if you chose Oswald flirting with a Polish piano tuner you win this week's "Who said it?" title quote competition. 

Otherwise, it was a pretty darn grueling leg as the Racers had to book multiple flights to get from Zanzibar to Warsaw -- what no direct flights?!  Or should I say "try" to book flights... as we learn if you find yourself on this island off the coast of Africa, you probably want to have your plane tickets home or to your next location already in hand as some Racers spend 7 hours in the travel agency (hopefully, they were just exaggerating... but I think not).

In the first hour (oy, these special two-hour TARs are exhausting), the Guidos and Eric/Danielle fall behind when they miss a connecting flight in Kilimanjaro.  And fall waaaay behind...and I mean really behind... "leave the next day" waaaay behind... ouch!  But yet another piece of African travel advice, as demonstrated by Joe, ringing a bell and shouting to the pilot will not bring plane back. This was the first major "that sucks" Race moment of last night's show.  (The second being the Beauty Queens having to waiting hours for a team to hook up with on the intersection).

Alas some of the teams do get to Poland, where they have to meet up with a piano playing Chopin (as pictured above, and what do you think that guy is thinking?!)... there seems to be some confusion among the teams whether it is the actual Chopin... but we won't go into that... or that for some reason Danielle thinks her pig-tailed blonde hair makes her look like a Polish girl?  Some confusion between Polish and blonde jokes?!

Since I have them pictured above, our favorite pair of Armenian cousins aren't making any friends in Poland.  I couldn't quite figure out why they were being ignored by pretty much anyone and everyone (including police officers?)... was it Mirna's screeching (which even wore on Charla's last nerve)... the unusual sight of a "little person"... or my hunch, that the "invisible to us" camera and sound crew did not encourage any interaction with the locals.

About halfway through the episode I had my "Oh No!" moment as the teams headed to... Auschwitz!   As I have mentioned over and over in the past, I have serious issues when the teams traipse through sacred ground... whether that be a place of worship or a place like Nelson Mandela's jail cell or the Hanoi Hilton.  I am too lazy to find it, but I said the "worst case scenario" would be a trip to a concentration camp. 

Thankfully it's all handled pretty well (as it usually is)... the teams are respectful and moved... with the teams doing not much more than reading a statement and lighting a candle.  Sitting on my recliner, I couldn't help but be moved as well and can only imagine what it would like to be there (I think that would be something to experience, but I have my doubts that my travels will ever take me to Poland). 

However (and as usual!), there is no good segue to get back to the Race... but we must... so its off to the snort-filled laughter thanks to a kielbasa eating challenge and Charla, in full body armor, falling on her face while guiding a horse.  First off, the non-Fast Forward teams must eat 2 feet of kielbasa each... which is a tremendous amount of food and many do not come out unscathed... with the television audience being simultaneously disgusted and amused by vomiting Dustin and Charla... the former, giving Eric a break from watching his "relationship" with Dani disintegrate before his eyes to deliver arguably the best line of the night... "Ladies and gentlemen, Miss California!"  (30-year old Mirna's "I am a young girl" plea to a driver was also pretty classic.)

Ultimately, we say adieu to Team Guido who could not survive being "marked for Philimination."  They never seemed to be the force (or as reviled) in All Stars that they were in the very first Amazing Race.  They were reality show trailblazers in being a older gay couple in a long-term relationship... and being a compelling team is likely one of the reasons we see at least one gay Racer on the show pretty much each season.  Granted they were never my favorite team (either time), but that's saying something too...

TAR-AS: Rat Pack

Thoughts on last night's episode "You Need To Watch Your Jokes, Guy"... not the most eventful TAR episode ever, particularly with the "it has to be this week" non-Philimination.... thus a pretty short review (well, "short" by my standards!).

The title of the episode arose from the continuing Eric/Dani vs. Guidos feud... which even the editors could not make terribly compelling... with the pretty boy attempting to out verbalize the queens (sorry, Dustin and Kandice you may have to relinquish that title for All-Stars)... good luck with that!

The "f" word is thrown around a bit.  First, Eric and Dani calling the the Guidos "freaks, freaks, freaks." While this could be considered homophobic, given that the 50+ year old couple is wearing matching lycra biking tops emblazoned with their team name, I'll give Eric/Dani the benefit of the doubt this time around. 

Both gay teams really butch-ed it up... going with the charcoal challenge instead of the nail polishing one (which proved the wrong choice for any team, just ask Teri & Ian who got to the nail polishing by mistake and ended up in 3rd place for the night).   And yes, double standard-wise we can use the more notorious "f"-word on ourselves... with Oswald comically referring to heavily charcoal-ed Danny as looking like a "faggy raccoon."  And how great was it that they chased poor Phil around... we love Team Cha Cha Cha (even with flowers in their hair).

But the best line of the night, comes from the first place team of Mirna and Charla (now I never thought I would be writing that line... well, at least the second half of it).  It was classic Mirna in the interview piece at the top of the show!  Her team self-analysis went something like this "Somehow Charla and I muster our strength, no matter how tired we are, or that she's out of breath'' ... adding that other teams, after they single-handedly knocked out the mighty Romber, should not underestimate them ''just because someone's a little shorter or a little skinnier.''  I don't know what was funnier the continuing backhanded dissing of Charla or Mirna identifying her svelteness as the a potential team weakness.

So do you think Uchenna & Joyce will survive being "marked for Philimination"?  Despite their first place finish, I'm thinking it's still nice to have Team Schmirna as a safety net of sorts... though "being lucky" plus the 30 minute penalty should still make it a nail-biter.

TAR-AS: David v. Goliath

Thoughts on last night's episode, quite oddly titled "No Babies On The Race" since it came from Eric & Danielle, who granted finished quite nicely... but is that what we're talking about today?!

I haven't been yelled at about it yet, but if you have *NOT* seen this episode and/or want to avoid SPOILERS... go away!   But if you care about a reality show and surf the Web at all, you know you pretty much have to watch the show on the same night.

A bit ironic that for such a buzz-worthy episode, I found there was not much to "talk" about until the final moments.  Sure, we were given some advance warning about the a "water cooler"-worthy ending, but I didn't give that much weight since I am more often than not underwhelmed by "shocking" teasers or ads. Alas this one lived up to the hype.

But let's return to Charla and Mirna.  I don't know if this is their "official" team name, but I am very amused that Entertainment Weekly has started to referring to them as "Team Batsh&t" in their weekly recaps.  The are loony tunes for sure.  I would have loved to been in the room with the cousins last night when Mirna let out this gem... "Charla obviously wants to contribute, but I do more than any one single person has probably ever had to do on the Race to compensate for any shortcomings that we have.”  The first half is offensive enough, but then to have the cahones to use the word shortcomings!  Ay!

I was pretty amused with Amber's Rob-worthy "got it" clue fake-out... but as we learned later... in another deluded display from Mirna.. that much like Wonder Woman's magic lasso, she has the power to "tell when someone's lying."  So, if this doesn't work out maybe she can land a gig on Heroes. 

So as we approach the final minutes of the episode... and the hint from last week's teaser as well as some good, old-fashioned "karma's a bitch" editing of tonight's episode gives us all the clues we ned... we are about to witness a TAR upset of epic proportions.  You could not have paid me enough money to think Charla and Mirna would outlast Romber, let alone be the team that beats them out to the Philimination mat.

It was almost like when the #1 seed is knocked out in a sporting event... and funny enough, last night in the tennis world, Roger Federer lost in the first round of the Indian Wells tournament.  His first lost since August and breaking his 41 match win-streak  I was thinking I had been transported to some bizarro world, where everything was flipped... but as stunning as the Federer loss was, I'd still have put more money on that than last night's TAR finish!

I am sad to see Rob and Amber go... I have no shame in admitting that I like 'em.  And whether you did or not, you have to admit they were good sports in the end.  (Though their lackadaisical run to the mat and reaction was a tad suspicious, conspiracy theories anyone?!)  The season certainly loses a good deal of competitive fire, but perhaps with teams no longer obsessing about them, other teams will think they stand a chance.  Although they were listed as "Recently Married," their team description should have been "Professional Reality Show Couple"... and they didn't even gain their "fame" via TAR... so, despite being a Romber fan, I am glad a true "regular folk" TAR team will win All-Stars.  (And kind of lost in last night's episode was Danny and Oswald's cool, calm, collected first place finish... how great was that?!)

TAR-AS: Fish Out of Water

Thoughts on this week's TAR episode..."I'm Sorry I'm Wearing A Bathing Suit. It Is Very Weird, I Know"... can we make the title a bit longer guys?!?  My pre-episode "who said it?" guess was Charla... pretty close, it was cousin Mirna talking to her hostage the guy she brought along for directions.

Speaking of which... the last two episodes reminded me why Mirna and Schmirna are not one of the most beloved team in TAR history.  While Teri and Ian are by no means Mr. & Mrs. Congeniality, they were totally in the right get to get snippy with the cousins as they charged the airport counter.  While I find Charla amusing when she uses her little-ness to get ahead, her telling the Beauty Queens ''I can't see over the counter because I'm not as privileged as you are.'' was just a little snide... but I guess an improvement over last week's voice over re: the Blondes not possessing inner beauty and intimating about plastic surgery!  Me-ow!  Charla & Mirna are certainly putting the gay teams to shame with their "oh no you di'int?" bravado.

I was a tad surprised by some of the "rookie"-ish errors made by the teams last night.  First, the Guidos not getting the whole clue down.  I was really hoping the Philimination was not going to between the Guidos and Charla/Mirna... as it really would have sucked if the Guidos survived only because they were extremely lucky running into the cousins and getting back on course.  Seeing as Phil had a fellow "little person" waiting with him on the mat, I was thinking that was not a good sign/omen for Charla.  But far more surprising was the Beauty Queens missing the Detour instruction and going right into the rafting.  They questioned how strange that was... if it's too good to be true, it is!   Good thing for them the rules didn't make them re-do the rafting... though I am guessing they would have been fine (heck, the didn't even lose a place having to go back and retrieve the clue).

As pictured above, we had a lot of fun watching make funny faces and squeal with a Road Block that required a team member to transfer flounders from one tank to another.  This proved a lot more challenging than I would have thought... so much fish and water phobia!   It was pretty funny when Amber quickly volunteered to do it wisely noting that "if she (Danielle) can do it, I can do it."  Good thing for the screaming Danielle that Eric informed her to use her calming breasts on the fish... and say what you will about Rob, but it was pretty gentleman-ly that he was a bit taken aback by Eric's attention to his girlfriend's chest.

I thought for sure Romber would not end up first this week... but even to their surprise, they kept their undefeated All-Stars streak going... nice to see Uchenna and Joyce finally get to the top of the pack... and Eric and Danielle completed a trio that I would not at all be surprised to see in the final leg (though I'll throw in Teri and Ian as my wildcard).

Alas, we said our goodbyes to Dave and Mary... and while I totally agree that they are quite sweet, from a competitive standpoint they were not quite deserving of All-Stars status (as I am sure many potential ex-Racers would agree). That said, I am still impressed that they made it to the 3rd leg.  Likewise, I will give my belated good riddance to last week's Philiminated team, Kevin and Drew.  We were really quite fond of this team from the very first Race... but they were just downright miserable in All-Stars (and not miserable in a good way)... and Drew completely falling apart physically (heck, he's our age!) coupled with his bad sportsmanship at the Philimination was really hard to watch (though kudos for Kevin)... again, I am sure they were many former teams who would have loved to have had their slot.   I can't see Charla and Mirna lasting too much longer... and then the Race is really on.

TAR-AS: Romper Romber Room Part II

I guess my blogging life just started getting a little easier... since I have soft commitments about posting about Amazing Race and American Idol... that's pretty much three no-brainer posts (at least for the next few weeks, until the Idol Final 12 starts and the show returns to a mere two episodes a week). 

Anyhow, onto my thoughts on the premiere of The Amazing Race: All Stars (hence forth known as TAR-AS)... entitled "I Told You Less Martinis and More Cardio"... which btw, I correctly guessed referred to Danny and Oswald... do I know my TAR teams or what?  Well, okay, that one was pretty easy.  No title/quote for next week's show just yet on the TiVo, but we'll see if we can keep this "contest" going (check later in the week?).

I thought the opener was a tad under-whelming.  Not sure why... it was good to see most of the teams again, that I really found it hard to want to see anyone go just yet. 

That said, Eric and Danielle made me a bit gaggy... granted it is nice to see E's double nipple piercings, but Danielle... well, ummm... Mamma always said if you don't have something nice to say.... likewise, Dave and Mary might be All-Star personalities, but certainly not when it comes to racing... their attempt to play a different "game" by lying to the Beauty Queens about the "quicker" flight was pretty weak.  The Blondes saw through that one in about 2.7 seconds.  Otherwise, I was a bit surprised how many of the teams struggled right out of the gates -- Kevin & Drew, past winners Uchenna & Joyce, and even Guido.  Though I love 'em to death, I really don't know how Kevin & Drew escaped Philimination... I sense they will not be around for long... Kevin outrun by Charla?!  Yikes!

Though Ambah seemed a bit winded as they hit the mat, it didn't seem like it required much effort at all for these professional reality contestants to waltz into first place (even after doing 1.5 detours).  As the first time around, this will be the divisive team amongst the fan-base.  Like red state-blue state, there is little middle ground with Rob & Amber.  Personally, we love how they drive everyone (other contestants, the viewers) nutzoid.  Sure it's annoying when they boast that everyone wants to Race against them, but then it ends up that they are right (either truly or thanks to to some creative editing).

Otherwise, enjoyed Danny and Oswald (still wonderfully low energy), Teri and Ian (still old, still not terribly likable... but spunky and competitive), Charla and Mirna (true originals and highly quotable "mucho dinero, muy rapido!")... did I miss anyone?!

Of course, our Philiminated team of John Vito and Jill.  Now I did not think they were the most compelling team (personality or competition-wise) to bring back, but I still enjoyed their story and really thought they could have made it much farther in All-Stars.  But no matter how fit or nice you are, wrong turns and bad luck are the equalizer when it comes to TAR.

I Just Got Electrocuted!

Ok, apologies for the startling post title... but if you are an Amazing Race aficionado you will likely recall that line from TAR5, but more on that in just a bit...

I am a bit better today but in this little tug 'o war taking place in my head, the sinuses are still holding an advantage.  I sense I'm turning a corner...  though at Day 3, I darn well should be! 

So since I am still not 100% (plus work hasn't been totally agreeable - another bad part of working from home is that it is difficult to take/justify a "sick" day), I figured a 'lil cop-out for today's entry and post a video...

The Amazing Race All-Stars start this Sunday!  We are definitely looking forward to seeing some of our favorite teams back in action.  The title of the premiere episode is "I Told You Less Martinis and More Cardio."  Any guesses who utters that line?  I figure it has to be one of the gay teams... my gut tells me it's Danny & Oswald, though I'd put a side-bet on Team Guido, Joe & Bill.

One of the most entertaining TAR teams is back - Charla and Mirna.  They are cousins, one a tough as nails "little person," the other a bit of a high-maintenance whiner in love with Philimator.

The below video highlights some of their greatest moments from the first time around... Charla carrying the beef, the gals asking a suspected prostitute for directions to the "discoteca," Marshall/Lance's drive-by "Bitch!" to Mirna, Charla imitating an airplane, and Charla playing hockey... and such memorable quotes as:

"Gracias! Gracias! Evita Peron!"
"You might have to stick your hand in the cow's ass"
"I just got electrocuted"

That last one that I have had search hits for years as Charla touches an electrified fence (with about 2:15 left in the approximately 6 minute video).  Classic!

There is also a "part two" but that's easy enough to find on your own after viewing this one...

UPDATE: Whoops!  It wasn't easy to find when you embed it on your own site... so here's the link to Part 2.

It's Official! Your Amazing Race All-Stars!

Kevin & Drew (Season 1)
Joe & Bill "Team Guido" (Season 1)
Oswald & Danny (Season 2)
John Vito & Jill (Season 3)
Teri & Ian (Season 3)
Charla & Mirna (Season 5)
Uchenna & Joyce (Season 7)
Rob & Amber (Season 7)
Eric & Danielle (Season 9) - "new" team, now dating (poor Jeremy & Dani!)
Dave & Mary (Season 10)
Dustin & Kandice (Season 10)

The Amazing Race All-Stars begins Sunday, February 18th!

The 'Race' is on, all-star style (USA Today)

UPDATE:  Here are some quick thoughts on the "cast."  I was just so excited to see the news this morning that I wanted to get the teams up ASAP.   

I am thrilled that the early seasons were not forgotten, glad to see Kevin/Drew, Joe/Bill, and Oswald/Danny back (and two gay male teams to boot!  for those TAR newbies, not Kevin and Drew... though they can bicker like a gay couple with the best of 'em). 

John Vito/Jill, not a bad choice perhaps now more interesting since they are no longer a couple.

Teri/Ian were my "old folks" choice to return, they had an edge and weren't instantly likable, so ironically enough I liked that!   

Charla & Mirna, I think were pretty much a slam dunk to be an All-Stars. 

As "monette" commented, mixed feelings about Uchenna/Joyce and Rob/Amber.  I am fans of both teams (yes, even Romber!).  But if you are going to bring back a winning team (Uchenna/Joyce), there is no good reason not to invite back other winners (equally/more charismatic teams of Chip/Kim and BJ/Tyler have been quite vocal about not being chosen)... and at this point, Rob/Amber are professional "reality" stars and I can quite understand why "normal" teams would be quite unhappy about their inclusion here (a 6th round of reality!).

Interesting "twist" that they created a new team with the melding of Eric/Danielle.  As noted above, I think their former partners Jeremy & Dani probably feel pretty screwed if they were willing to race again.

I personally would not have included Dave/Mary.  I think the appeal of them this past season was the whole "fish out of water" aspect... and that will be gone with a second go-round, particularly so soon (I haven't had a chance to miss them yet)... and besides, thanks to Rosie & The View... the racked up some major gifts like a new house, car, and vacations.  Dustin/Kandice are pretty good choices and, in my opinion, the most competitive all-female team ever to race (sorry Lyn & Karlyn)... but again, a bit too soon... and especially when there are no representatives from Seasons 4 & 6, plus the Family Edition (though that is probably alright). 

TAR10: EZ Pass It

Thoughts on the TAR10 finale "Say Your Deepest Prayers Ever"... as always, at least once a year God must turn his/her attention to decide who will win a reality competition show.

I'm not sure about this 1-hour finale to the TAR... didn't it seem a little cut-short/rushed to you?  No last minute challenges once the teams returned to the States (remember when BJ & Tyler and Eric & Jeremy were figuring out the flags... or even the Linz and Bransen families putting together that last jigsaw puzzle map)... heck, there wasn't even a long run to the finish!  Couldn't the cabbies just have dropped the teams off at the mat?!

So much of the morning after buzz is whether the toll-booth EZ Pass decided the winner?  The editing really makes it impossible to figure out how close Rob/Kim were behind... perhaps we'll find out on postmortem on The Early Show, but it seems like it could have been (again, one reason I don't mind a little challenge at the end).  I guess we'll find out in future season if Racers start asking their cabbie if they have EZ Pass... and, on a side note, apparently if you really need to get on a plane the "I'm racing around the world for $1 million" line seems to work (though you probably need to have a camera and sound person tagging along). 

At least the finale still had a couple of interesting moments. Tyler and James had their little spat at the airport... Tyler was probably just stunned that James had an idea with the suggestion of trying to book that all important final trans-Atlantic flight on the Internet.   At least it all worked out for them in the end (how they and Rob/Kim got on that flight I really don't know).  I have a feeling if they missed that flight Tyler would have never heard the end of it (and, I guess, deservedly so).

The other was Rob's skydive obsession.  I don't know if Kim is prepared for a lifetime of this, but this guy is a pitbull when it comes to letting things go.  Hopefully, in the few months that have passed since the finish, Rob has had a chance to do his frickin' skydive.  From what I hear, skydiving is not too hard to find, even here in the States... not just a little airport outside of Paris.  If they had won the million, Rob would have been ... "Well, Phil that's great, but I really wanted to do that skydive."

And I have to give 'Bama, Lyn and Karlyn, props.  Too bad with that missed flight that they dropped out of contention for the prize... because they were certainly falling into to puddles of luck of late.  And I said an "hell, no" when Lyn asked the camera who would have ever thought their team would have made it to the Final 3. Again, hard to believe they were the first all-female team to make it to the finals... and btw, Tyler and James are the 5th (yawn!) all-male team to win the Race... and that's not including the predominantly young and male Linzes of the much loved family edition.

Though I am a little concerned about the Tyler and James, while I certainly give them credit for fighting their drug and/or alcohol addiction... I am thinking $1 million along the illusion of "fame"... plus young, good-looking, in the modeling industry...  is probably a far greater challenge to face beyond racing 40,000+ miles around the world.

So now I have to figure out what I am going to blog about on Mondays!  Though not for too long... pretty stoked to see that the much anticipated Amazing Race: All Stars hits the airwaves in February.  Of course, when the teams are officially announced you know I'll be all over that news!

TAR10: You Say Tomato...

Thoughts on last night's TAR episode "Dude, I'm Such A Hot Giant Chick Right Now!":

Not a whole lot of suspense on the penultimate episode of the season... not to say there isn't a surprise.  Dare I say, anyone who said they predicted Alabama would be racing the finish line... well, you lie like a rug!  But despite trying to get us to the believe that the Barbies would manage to stick around for the finale with their yet another abduction of a foreigner quick rebound off the mat... by the time we returned from the last commercial break of the evening it was clear the gals wouldn't be able to over-come being "marked for Philimination."

Kudos to the show for coming up with one of the best detours of the season "Lug It or Lob It"... though "Lug It," where Racers had to don giant costumes and walk the streets of Barcelona, didn't end up being as funny as I thought it would.  Thankfully, that was more than made up in "Lob It"... where the Racers were pounded by locals with tomatoes as they searched a tomato pile of their own for the clue. This is one of those TAR challenges that just doesn't make me laugh... it elicits the sadistic cackle!  Oh, how I was loving Kimberly's breakdown as well as Rob spending more time throwing tomatoes back at the locals than searching for the clue.  The 'Bama Gals weren't nearly as hilarious, though I believe Lyn called one of the locals a bastard after getting conked on the head.... and it was worth a snicker that when both teams arrived at the finish mat that they still had tomato seeds on their faces.

So we're down to the Final 3... and while I wasn't a fan of the Barbies, I think there absence will make for a less competitive race to the finish.  I would have said it was a toss-up if 'Bama had been eliminated this week. 

However, I shouldn't diss 'Bama too badly... since being free of their "alliance" they have managed two 2nd place finishes, and comfortable finishes at that!  So they are certainly the Cinderella team going into the finale... and how about being the first all-female team to make it the final three EVER.  Now, of course, I knew there has never been an all-female winning team (as the Barbies regularly reminded us)... but I was slightly surprised to be reminded that no two ladies ever raced to the finish line together.  Again, you could not have bet me any kind of money that 'Bama would have been the first to do that!  So well deserved congrats on that (especially since it took 10 seasons to be a "first").

That said, I still think our choice will be the Model Boys and Rob/Kim... the Boys have yet to earn even a mention in this post thus far... but it just is no surprise that they're here (despite their 3rd place finish last night).  I think they have to be favorites... though dysfunctional couples do have a history of winning (Flo & Zach, Freddy & Kendra) so who knows!?!?  And Rob's tears at the mat last night, didn't earn any bonus point from me.  (In their update, EW had a "I'm glad they said what I'm thinking" analysis of Rob/Kim's relationship... the piece started off: "Have you ever been at a wedding where you secretly believe that there's no way the marriage will last?").

So next week is the finale (and the first time, I think, it's just an hour long)... so, sure I am rooting for Alabama... I think the Boys probably deserve to (and will) win... but my world wouldn't end if Rob/Kim finish first (unlike TAR6 when Freddy/Kendra beat out Jon/Kris) either.

TAR10: Mo' Rockin'

Thoughts on last night's TAR episode "We Just Won't Die, Like Roaches"...

As the Final Four teams headed to Morocco, I have to confess that I wasn't all too concerned about the order of finish... first off, I really don't care as there is no one I feel I can really root for ... but I also did a little TAR math... two episodes left after this one... three teams in the finale... so no Philimination tonight.

But after falling into the Barbies' spell over the last couple of weeks, I finally remembered what it was that got under my (and many others) skin... there was surely not a shortage of times the Barbies referred to Alabama as the "sis-tahs"... perhaps watching the show from the comfort of their living rooms they are realizing how badly that's coming across.   "Karma" was thrown out there last night, and while the Blondies did get a taste of it... with the non-Philimination it impossible to view it as a full serving.

And speaking of Alabama, how about them showing some racing skills... maybe the Six Pack was dragging them down!  Now that their on their own, it was the other three teams who were following around each other and thus allowing *lyn to get an early lead.  But as the race to the mat showed, they are lacking in the physical department... so, even if they do make it to the end I think they are in trouble (especially since that final leg is typically more grueling).  But it was still nice to see them working on their own... and succeeding!

So, the Boys won another leg... yawn!   It's really hard not to consider them the favorites.  Given the coming attractions for next week, it looks like Rob & Kim might be headed for a meltdown... but I have to give credit to Rob for holding it together during yet another car breakdown.  Like he said, he seems to be learning... but again, let's hold out any "grow as person" judgment until the Race is over.

Oh, more news on next season... which apparently will be the All-Stars edition.  I had previously noted that Colin & Christie and Charla & Mirnya were two of the teams rumored to be involved... now Reality Blurred (via Variety) is reporting a couple of more additions...

Dave & Mary from this season...  TAR7 champs Uchenna & Joyce... and some of you may have to sit down for this one... ready??   Reality whores regulars okay whores... Rob & Amber.   (Pausing for blood-curdling screams)  As you may recall, I am not among the Romber haters... so I really don't mind  (or dare I even say, welcome) their addition.  I'll continue to keep you posted... the article mentioned the Race started in mid-November and will air first quarter 2007.  So we'll just have a little break from the action once this season wraps up.

TAR10: Nice Guys Finish...

... well, you know how that line usually ends! :-(

Thoughts from last night's TAR episode "Lookin' Like A Blue-Haired Lady on a Sunday Drive"

Well, it was not the Philimination most of us where looking for, as The Cho Bros were... <ahem!  prepping my best "sad" Phil voice>... I'm sorry to say, the last team to arrive.  Now, I can't say that I didn't see it coming...   while "nice guys" do win TAR (think Chip & Kim or Uchenna & Joyce), I think the Chos just lacked competitive drive... or should I say over-drive to make them a viable team to win it all.

That said, I was still hoping they would be the last of the "Six/Back Pack" to survive...  but thankfully, their Philimination was not due to their nice-ness... while they did (arrrgh!) wait for 'Bama after the Roadblock... the editors didn't even try to make the "who's gonna be last?" sequence look like it would be close.

So, for the first time (I think), I feel like I don't have a team to root for in the Final 4...

'Bama has been losing me more and more each episode... and it has nothing to do with their independent spirit.  I think there is no point in any sort of extended alliances in the TAR.  My jaw dropped to the floor when one of them said something to the affect of "it's time for the Chos to start running their own Race"... this coming after after their 47th complaint that Chos were driving too slow and asking for directions too much... ummm, who exactly is not running their own Race here?  I think the answer is in the rear-view mirror... of the Chos' car!

From there it continues to be slim pickins' as we are left with this season's  "axis of evil" ... though individually, none of these teams would make it onto my "most hated" (or even "love to hate") list. 

The Model Boys are just not doing it for me. Sure they have had a minor scare or two, but it almost seems as if they are there by default, not expending a whole lot of effort (unlike last year's alpha-males, Eric & Jeremy... who were equally vacuous but seemed to sweat it a lot)... or maybe I should just give them credit for making it look easy (though I doubt that).

What can I say about Rob & Kim?  I think even the editors are tired of making Rob look like a jerk, just giving us few small doses of orneriness over the past couple of episodes.  Todd last night asked me if Rob pounds his first and shouts "it's over, we're out" in every episode.  Though these continued car troubles are making me more and more suspicious.  I'm willing to think there is a conspiracy theory that there is at least one lemon in every bunch of cars (well, except when the cars used are a not-so-sly product placement).

So, yes... as I alluded to in last week's update... I'm leaning... god help me...  towards the Barbies.  I just have think their Chernobyl "that's where the atomic bomb went off" line was "cute" instead of a scholarship pageant moment.  So while I haven't enjoyed their overall behavior (particularly to other teams)... they have been pretty darn competent, working together with an amazing lack of in-fighting... so begrudgingly... they are the lesser of two... three... umm, four evils.   

TAR10: Swamp Thing

Thoughts on last night's TAR10 episode "Being Polite Sucks Sometimes"...

It was probably a good thing that this episode was one of those dastardly "To Be Continued..." since I am not sure how well I paid attention to it.  I didn't get too much sleep on Saturday night... after a near fatal combination of dinner out (spicy carne adobada) and drinking in (grapefruit martinis)...  it gave me the worst heartburn ever... but I live to tell...

So, the show did see a little empty without Dave & Mary... and ironically enough, it figures that on the leg after they get Philiminated, the teams go into a mine... not that Dave's coal-mining skills would have given him any advantage, but still!  The heart of the Six Pack has certainly been ripped out and stomped all over... particularly with 'Bama, who not only cutting in front of the Chos but other innocent Finlanders who were quite politely queued for a cab.  This lead to Godwin uttering the line that gave the show its title... ok, boys its time to just play... no Miss Congeniality prizes given out here!

And speaking of that... the Barbies seem to be advancing along without much trouble.  While most of the teams seemed to have a hard time with the "swamp" challenge... the Barbies biggest concern appeared to be whether they would look like they "pooped their pants."  They are starting to earn my respect... perhaps even earning it fully last night had they not read Finland's capital city as "Helinski."   

But I am starting to think they have a chance to be the first all-female team to win the Race... the Model boys seem more prone to "off" days... Rob & Kim just seemed destined to self-destruct at a crucial point... the Chos really do need to stop being polite (and start getting real!)... and 'Bama is just hanging on.   So who knows!

But what about last night's final challenge... a forward-facing rappel (pictured above)?  Yikes!  Going down "normally" (backwards) is scary enough... I couldn't imagine doing that ... especially in a non-nature setting... it's one thing to have to look down at trees and dirt... but splat-worthy concrete would just be another mental hurdle to clear.   And, again, too bad that we won't see Dave & Mary have to do that one! 

TAR10: Lip Service

Thought's on last night's TAR episode "He Can't Swim, But He Can Eat Cow Lips"...

All in all, it was a pretty low-key episode last night... marked by a lack of in-fighting (was that Rob actually encouraging Kimberly during the Fast Forward) and offensive moments (save the Barbies head-scratcher of an assumption that The Chos would be good at paper-making since they were of Asian descent).  Even the editors couldn't keep the Axis of Evil vs. Six-Pack storyline afloat on this leg... okay, it was obnoxious that the Barbies left their damaged car for someone else (surprise, surprise the Chos end up with it)... but the Barbies didn't bother me all that much and you had to feel some sympathy for Rob/Kim and the "models" on the cow-lip eating Fast Forward... and cheering the underdogs can only last so long as the continue to bumble through the Race.

So what did you think of the new Intersection feature?  Call me a TAR purist, but I prefer the teams to have to work independently rather than be forced to team up.  Now I still think it was fun twist... particularly when the Barbies were cloaked in an invisibility shield when Kentucky & Alabama arrived... but let's face it, it worked out just fine for both the Barbies and The Chos that they were teamed up and not saddled down by either of the other two teams. 

The "Not So Fast" Forward was truly horrific with the above-mentioned cow-lip plate. I was shocked by the quantity... if it is a "delicacy" I would not have thought there would be a whole herd's worth of lip on each plate and considered one serving size!   So it certainly sucked that after eating (and gagging and regurgitating) all that cow lip that at least one of those teams didn't get that lovely Hawaiian vacation when they finally made their way to Phil.   After watching last night's episode, I am guessing the two teams regretted skipping what was a not so very challenging Detour/Road Block combo.

So alas, while I was sad to see Dave & Mary go... it was the expected emotional goodbye, but a necessary Philimination for the sake of any shred of competition for the remaining legs of the Race (and likewise saved the integrity of being "marked for elimination")  In that spirit, the Alabama gals really need to be next... then we'll see what the Cho Bros can do (though Kentucky being the glue of the 6-Pack, I think this "alliance" is all but over).  But kudos to the creators for "casting" Dave & Mary, by far they were the most entertaining team of this season... and they surely lasted way longer than I ever would have imagined. 

Delicious Maritius

Some thoughts on last night's TAR episode entitled "I Wonder If This Is Going To Make My Fingers Pickle"... which may also include some thoughts about the previous (and un-blogged) episode that didn't quite happen in my post-Vegas haze.

So we definitely have some good vs. evil going on... it's 6 vs 6 for sure... with not a whole lot of empathy being directed in the non-Six Pack/Back Pack of The Chos, Alabama, and Kentucky.  With Peter out as Asswipe #1 it was time for Rob to re-gain that title with a whole lot of unnecessary screaming at and condescension towards Kimberly... and the "outer not inner" beauty teams of the Pageant Queens and Models.  Now 'Bama is quite the ornery team... but the gals referring to them as "sistahs" last week and Tyler (?) wagging his finger back in Karlyn's face, I have to say was mildly shocking... and here I thought I was going to have to be worried about racism on this year's edition of Survivor!

Now with regard to the Six-Pack, I am starting to think the Chos are being a bit too nice... bordering on stupid.  If I was on the Race, I would certainly like to think that I would bond with some teams and be helpful... but to a degree.  Just because it's a reality show, does not mean an "alliance" is a requirement.  Ok, do the fake-out and give Dave & Mary the fast-forward but get your butts back up the tower immediately... and I certainly would not have waited for them to swim back to shore on last night's episode.  In this way, I think 'Bama has it right attitude... if you're around I'll help, but there's no way I'm hanging around.

And what about that flight plan... seems like you can somehow fly from Kuwait down to Mauritius, an island off the East Coast of Africa, without having to fly to London first?!?  Though it did make them sound pretty stupid,  I don't blame Dustin & Kandice for asking what country.  I was curious about the actual flight time.  Get this... in the 30-seconds of air time it showed the teams bordering the plane, Phil telling us how they were getting them, and arriving on the island... the teams had a 7 hour flight from Kuwait to London, then a 12-hour flight from London to Mauritius... and who knows how long the layover was in London... yikes!   

So we end the episode with Dave & Mary once again being "marked for Philimination."  While they are certainly entertaining, I have to admit... that along the lines of Jerry Springer on Dancing With The Stars... I almost would have preferred they be put out of their misery.  It is certainly a bit delusional that the Six Pack thinks they are going to make it to the Final Leg... but still, I guess you got to love their optimism!

TAR10: See Ya Later Alligator

Thoughts from last night's TAR10 episode "I Covered His Mouth, Oh My Gosh!"

There didn't seem to be a whole lot new going on in last night's leg... the Barbies still wanted to be the first all-female team to win the Race, the models are still able to "dig deep" to due overcoming their drug addiction,  Sarah's hydraulic knee is still problematic and Peter is still a jerk... about the only thing was the relative calm between Rob & Kimberly this week.

But back to Peter & Sarah for a minute... I still suspect we are getting a slanted view of what is going on.  Now granted I don't think Peter is any peach... but I still don't think Sarah is "raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens."  Peter's smugness is quite palpable, but at times I am thinking he is just wishing she would just shut up... especially since on some of their most divisive legs they have been finishing in the front of the pack... so something is working fine.

Tyler & James' reaction to finishing near the back was quite amusing... how dare a team so young, fit, and good-looking should be anywhere near Philimination?  Humbling, indeed.  But of any of the teams, they were the last ones I thought would go ahead and do the Rice detour... I am betting they felt pretty sillly after watching last night's episode to see how apparently easy the Alligator option was... especially since it appeared that the park employees did 80% of the work (and as well they should with those scary creatures!).

Of course, the Cho Brothers were adorable in their Phil shirts (pictured above)... that read LOST "Reward: A Bushel of Kiwis"... a tribute to Koeghan's New Zealand homeland.  However, the are really too nice... their little cell-phone fake-out was pretty amusing... though I wasn't at all surprised when all it did was inspire Peter to find a real cell-phone to call and make flight reservations. 

As expected, we ended with our first non-Philimination... which I thought was already an episode or two overdue... and thankfully it saved the most entertaining team on this year's Race, David & Mary.  So what did you think of the new rules... being "marked for elimination" ... so either the need to finish 1st or arrive at least 30 minutes before the last place team.  I personally like it.  I have never been a big fan of the begging for money (especially when the teams are in a poor country)... so I think this is just fine.  Plus any time there has been a time-penalty it has been pretty tense (or at least the editors get us to believe that).  But considering the first and last place teams were only 2.5 hours a part... a 30 minute delay is pretty significant.

Finally, TVGasm is reporting today that the next edition of TAR (TAR11) will be the much rumored, highly anticipated (??) All-Star Edition... with Colin & Christie and Charla & Mirna as confirmed participants.  Those teams are two of my wish-list picks (remember when we thought Colin was the devil incarnate?  Little did we know who would lie ahead in future seasons!). So who would you like to see in All-Stars?

Here are some teams that popped into my head: Kevin & Drew, Bowling Moms (Linda & Karen), Oswald & Danny, Kris & Jon, Hera & Gus... how about a pair from the Paolo family? 

TAR10: Row, Row, Row Your Boat

Thoughts on last night's episode "I Know Phil, Little Ol' Gorgeous Thing"... much to our surprise, it was Mary who uttered that phrase and not Tom & Terry.

Ok, admittedly I succumb to short-term memory loss... but I am thinking last night's leg has to be up there as one of the most physically demanding ever.  The cliff climb and rappell could have qualified alone, but the rowboat pretty much reduced each of the teams to either tears, screaming at each other, or both.  It was quite difficult to watch the teams struggle.  I certainly daydream about being on TAR, but last night was one of those times when I was more than happy that it's all in my head... it would not have been one of my prouder moments.  Perhaps I am just having a bad childhood rowboat flashback... with my family frantically trying to get out of the way of an oncoming steamboat on Lake George in upstate NY. 

But, I am ready to jump on the Peter hate-wagon.  I thought Rob (of Rob & Kimberly) was going to be the villian of the season... granted Rob continues to be no angel (and I am certainly curious of how his strategy of not talking to foreigners will work for him), but he was outdone by Peter last night... though I am thinking we are being partially led in this direction... we get that one-on-one camera time with Sarah bitching about her partner, but Peter is not given that same opportunity.  Being the stronger half of a physically challenged team, one loses the whining privilege.  I think Mirna (of Charla & Mirna) could relate.  But I think as a prosthetist,and particularly in relation to Sarah, Peter has a bit of a messiah complex.  Though I am also mildy tiring of Sarah's "I can't do this" wolf cries... at one point, I yelled to the TV "Of course, you can!" and of course, she did... and all credit to her!  But, I am still surprised how negatively Peter & Sarah are coming across ... even amongst their fellow racers. 

Otherwise still enjoying the self-proclaimed "Back Pack".... David & Mary, Lyn & Karlyn, and the Cho Brothers (though given Erwin & Godwin's age and physical stature, they most certainly should not be viewed as non-contenders)... but, of course, we lost of the members of that club... Tom & Terry.  Now I was getting a little annoyed with the "I don't know what to do" whining ... which was uttered over and over again... but they did toughen up (though still in a "I broke a nail" way) just to get to the mat.   

I was quite surprised it was a non-Philimination.  I thought we were due for one, but especially after the physical demands of this leg, I thought for sure the last place team would get a reprieve.  But the Philiminator showed no mercy... and as I said, if I was in Tom & Terry's place, I think I would have been somewhat relieved to wave the white surrender flag as well.

TAR10: Hanoi'd

Thoughts on last night's TAR10 episode, "Oh Wow, It's Like One of Those Things You See on TV"...

Ok, last night one of my major TAR pet peeves was on full display. 

While I very much appreciate, TAR giving us a history lesson along the way... I am thinking they should re-think stops at "sacred" places of historical and religious (whoever that God may be in the particular country) signficance.

[soapbox on]
I was pretty annoyed how the teams were racing through the Hanoi Hilton in their attempts to find a clue next the jumpsuit of Senator, and former Vietnam War POW, John McCain.  Once it was stumbled upon, the teams were a bunch of vultures as they grabbed for the clue... most not even taken a peripheral glance at the McCain exhibit.  My faith was very much restored when the Cho brothers stopped for a moment of silence, which did put them temporarily in last place... but in a very nice karmic twist, after floundering in the Race thus far, they finished 1st for this leg. 

I felt the same way about the time the teams stopped at the site where Africans were shipped off to "new world" to become slaves (who can forget Gus & Hera's emotional moment there)... or when Nelson Mandela's jail cell was a stop along the way.  Now I know this is a Race... and the focus/goal is to get and stay ahead... not that they should have needed to be told, but they should have been given some appropriate behavior guidance... the Hanoi Hilton was no different than "tromping" through Auschwitz or Ground Zero.
[soapbox off]

Speaking of warnings, it was not a good day to be gay.  We were teased with the possible elimination of Tom & Terry as they failed at TAR Rule #1 (Read the clue)... by catching a ride on a motorbike and were docked 30 minutes at the finish mat... dropping them from 2nd to last (8th) place.  Though they staved off Philimination as the bird-cage detour slowed down Duke and lesbian daughter Lauren enough to give them the boot.  Too bad, they seemed to be doing pretty good... but had the all too typical "bad day."

It was nice to see the comraderie between Kentucky and Alabama... fearing they were the last two teams, Lyn & Karlyn genuinely feeling bad