Whine & Cheese

Playing Doctor

Hey you... over here... yoo hoo... over here!

I know the picture is not  one I should used when I want you to pay attention to "the words"... but ogle later and we'll get to reason why I posted the picture in the first place (and yes, I know there are newer Speedo pix of the Puerto Rican pop prince...but I have my reason for using this older one... patience, patience).

As the post title suggests, we're playing doctor today... well, not that way.  I want you to play doctor on me... oh, that's not any better, huh?  Okay, how about it's time for "You make the medical call!"

I have had this "thing" for a few weeks and since I couldn't come up with anything else to blog about this morning so I figured it was time to ask my knowledgeable readers for their expert opinion... don't you hate when you've been wracking your brain over something and then finally ask someone and they're like "oh yeah, it's just..."  So that's what I'm doing here... and no worries I won't (and can't?!) sue you for medical malpractice.

I have had this discomfort, kind of a centralized "knot" sort of thing...it's near the "belt" region on my left side or, for purely illustrative purposes, where X marks the spot on Mr. La Vida Loca. There is no pain involved... but it has been  pretty uncomfortable... it has not gone away and it varies in intensity... most noticeable when I get up/out of bed in the morning or when I bend/stretch in certain ways.

My hypochondria zeroed in on a hernia... but there is no sign (at least that I can tell) of the characteristic lump or swelling of a hernia... nothing hurts or becomes more/less uncomfortable when I press around the area... and it's fairly localized, nothing wrong or not feeling right with "the equipment"... so maybe just a muscle pull of some sort?

Any thoughts or ideas?   Over-reaction or will I die a slow painful death? 

UPDATE (response to comment):  Unfortunately Scott, my doctor of 3+ years (who I met for the first time in January) looks ready for retirement any day now (or should be retired already)! 

Baby Got Back (Pain)

More tales from the weekend...

On Saturday morning, I threw out my back... well, to be more specific my backside.

Okay, I'll pause for snickering...

Done?

I had just come back from a fairly early (pre-hellish temps) morning walk with Toby.  I had felt a little tweak while out, but nothing too bad... but when we arrived back and I stopped, something really seized up. I had these shooting pains that were fairly zoned in on the buttocks.  Now I have had my lower back go out on occasion, but this was the first time that is was so focused on the region a little farther south.

My mom has bouts with sciatica, so I don't know if that was what I was genetically experiencing... but from what I understand it's in that anatomy neighborhood. 

It wasn't pleasant... any little move or bend... made me jump, wince, and/or gasp... which was really quite the vicious cycle.  So I tried to keep moving (which I understand is the right thing to do vs. resting), but just tried to be very slow and careful.  In the afternoon, I took a dip in the pool... did some leg kicks, "bicycling," and stretching... and that seemed to help... thankfully, by the time Buckaroo arrived I was no longer in heavy spaz-mode.

It was a bit challenging getting out of bed on Sunday... things tightened up overnight... pretty much, the same thing this morning (though slightly better).  I am still having some seizing up, but I still managed to walk Toby on Sunday and this morning.  If anyone was watching, it must have been quite comical.  I'll be doing fine, then it looks like I walk over a pebble/stone and do this crazy "whoops" slip... of course, there is no pebble... just my back/back-side feeling it's crunching down like an accordian! 

I hit the pool a bit last night for "rehab" and plan to do that again today.   I am not worried, all it needs is some time... and an increasing realization that I'd better get used to this kind of stuff! 

You Give Me Fever

... and not in the good way.

Yesterday, I was just not feeling right... felt pretty tired in the morning and it seemed like I couldn't really focus on anything and certainly wasn't very motivated to do all that much.  My guess was that it was mostly psychosomatic... things just didn't feel right around the house with Mindy not around (or Lucy for that matter)... Toby was certainly in heavy "crash" mode.

But then things just got worse as the day moved on... my suspicion was that it was lack of food (I have a tendency to "forget" to eat)... and I also took Toby out for a walk and it was pretty warm... so no food and direct sun tends not to be a great combo... so started getting head-achy... but then started feeling sore/achy behind my knees (a sign for me that something is really up) and ... so felt warm all over and the ears heated up... so it was time to take the temperature... 100.6, so not bad, but still enough to feel pretty darn crappy.

I was in bed and asleep by 9:30... but didn't have a very restful night... felt pretty warm and clammy for a while... and just felt like I was hallucinating for most of the night (I did pop a couple of Tylenol before bed)... just weird repetitive dreams... fortunately I knew work was pretty light today, so I "slept in" to about 8am...

So feeling better, certainly no fever (though I haven't officially checked it)... but still feel a bit off... so I think I am off to bed for a little bit more...

Eye, Yi, Eye

I think I go to the most incompetent "vision center" in the country.

Last week, I went to the a new supply of contact lenses... but since a year had passed, I was forced into an eye exam despite having no complaints about my current lens prescription. 

I ended up being there for 1 hour and 20 minutes... of which only 10 minutes were spent with the doctor... the rest of the time was spent on them insisting I get my eyes dilated and a lot of waiting around. 

The doctor, much to my surprise, lowered the prescription in my right eye.  He warned me it might not work, but to give it a shot.  Well, surprise surprise... the right eye did end up being a bit off!  So yesterday I headed back to hopefully just return to my original prescription.

So let's meet the players, we have: Desk Receptionist #1 (DR1), Desk Receptionist #2 (DR2), Assistant, Technician, and Doctor.

I arrive and the office is pretty empty... there is only one other customer who is being helped out by the assistant.  I tell DR1 my issue, she pulls my file and says it will just be a couple of minutes. I take a seat.

DR2 is making phone calls to re-schedule appts for next week since the doctor schedule has shifted from morning to afternoon.  Customer is finished with Assistant and leaves the office, so now I am the only non-employee.

DR2 is done making phone calls and starts having conversation with Assistant across the office, while Assistant is wrapping up some stuff from the last customer on her computer... Assistant is going to Arkansas for Thanksgiving to visit her mother, her husband his not going and visiting his family instead, she is on vacation starting Tuesday of next week... she hates Arkansas and says it is really racist.

Assistant asks Doctor for what code she should put into the computer... Doctor sits down and goes over some stuff with her.

DR2 leaves the office, but on the way out asks if I have been helped... I respond "I think so"

Technician comes out and asks where DR2 is.... while waiting for her return, Technician starts having conversation with DR1.  DR1 is tired, she was out late with friends last night and thinks she might be getting a cold since she was out late last night in just a tank top and bare feet.  Technician starts explaining to her the difference between a virus and a cold.

Assistant and Doctor seem to be finished with the computer code issue and are just chatting away about something else.

DR2 returns and they are all gathered at the desk talking about something else... I don't know what about... at this point I am trying to figure out how to lift the invisibility shield that has apparently surrounded me.

Assistant gets up and comes over to the desk and says to DR1 ... "what's he here for?"  DR1 starts to inadequately recall that reason ... and that is where I pipe up and say ... with the entire office staff present "do you just want me to tell you?"

Technician pops up and says "oh you have been sitting there oh so patient"...  I can only imagine what may facial expression was at this point.

Doctor comes up to front desk and starts looking at my file... and finally brings me back to the exam room.

She puts some lenses over my eyes (you know the good 'ole... what's better "1 or 2" "2 or 3")... and ultimately changes the prescription that I received on Thursday in both my eyes!

They take my old supply of contact lenses and go to the back to get me some new boxes for this latest prescription.  It is no shock that they don't have a supply for one of my eyes... so they have to order them... they'll give me a call when they come in.

On the way home, I realize that I probably just screwed myself since I didn't get a receipt or any other physical evidence that I turned in my old supply of lenses... so I am fully prepared that when the new ones come in they are going to say... that'll be such-and-such $$s.

And even better yet,... this morning, I still don't think the vision in my right eye is as good as it was before last week's eye exam!